Alan Carr's dog attacked Scottish bagpiper's sporran
Alan Carr's dog caused chaos when he invited a Scottish bagpiper to play at his residence, Ayton Castle.
Alan Carr's dog attacked a Scottish bagpiper's sporran.
The 50-year-old comedian invited the musician to play at his 17-bedroom Ayton Castle in Berwickshire, South East Scotland, which Alan bought for £3.25 million earlier this year, but the occasion turned chaotic when Rita set her eyes on the sporran.
On the latest episode of his Life's a Beach podcast, Alan told his 69-year-old guest, humorist-and-comic David Sedaris: "I recently moved up to Scotland, and we had a bagpiper, and Rita, my deaf dog, attacked his sporran - it's the hairy bit that hangs above [the kilt].
"And he was like, 'Keep your dog under f****** control.'"
But The Celebrity Traitors 2025 winner was "very protective" of Rita.
He said: "Instead of telling the dog off, I was slagging off the Scottish National dress - 'It looks like a puppy you've got between your legs.'
"I should have said something, but you do get very protective about your dog. My dog can't do anything wrong, and all she spends her time doing is doing things wrong."
Alan asked the bagpiper what he keeps inside his sporran, expecting a "romantic" response.
Instead, the musician said: "My vape."
The funnyman added to podcast guest David: "I was expecting a wee drum of whisky or a Robert Burns poem!'"
Alan purchased Ayton Castle earlier this year, and he is currently refurbishing the grand property, which will be documented in his upcoming Disney+ series Castle Man.
In March, the entertainer said he wants to put on community events on the grounds - featuring 160 acres of gardens and parkland - including dog shows, fetes and live comedy.
Speaking at Advertising Week Europe in London, Alan said: "I just fell in love with it, and I know you sound like a w****** when say you've got a castle, but what I want to do with it, community-based, fun things, a real sense of getting a relationship with the community and stuff.
"I've got some wonderful ideas, it's giving something back, that's what excites me more."
Alan - who has the right to a feudal barony - joked that he could even "judge the biggest courgette in the village".
He also stressed that the castle is his, and not something Disney provided for the purpose of the show.
Alan said: "Because, what I want to say is, as well, I genuinely have bought the castle, and I saw some whisperings, they think, 'oh no, yeah, yeah', I get it, we're used to seeing gimmicks on TV and going, 'oh yeah, Disney+ have bought your castle' - no, I bought the castle.
"I'm selling up, I'm moving up there, it's genuine.
"There was in the paper that I'm turning it into a leisure centre and spa, I love the smell of chlorine in the house. It's genuine... and my heart is going, it's a lot of money, and I'm moving up to Scotland... so it's got to work."
