Amanda Holden: I'll always say I'm a mother of three
TV star Amanda Holden has reflected on losing her son back in 2011.
Amanda Holden always describes herself as "a mother of three".
The 54-year-old TV star has opened up about the heart-breaking loss of her son Theo, who was stillborn at seven months back in 2011.
Amanda - who has Lexi, 20, and Hollie, 13, with husband Chris Hughes - said on the latest episode of Amanda and Alan's Greek Job: "When we lost Theo, there wasn't one moment where I thought why has this happened to me?
"But there also wasn't a moment where I sort of blamed God or anything. And I just, the way I accepted it was to say that he chose me, just for those few months to see what it was like to live and develop and be in the universe, and then the universe took him back.
"Now I don't think that's religious, but I let him go back, and that was my belief rather than like he went back to heaven as such.
"I felt like he went back into the universe and he's out there, and he's still part of our family. Only way I could make sense of it.
"I was like, gosh, I was so lucky to have him for all that time. And even though he was born sleeping, he was perfect. And I always, always say I'm a mother of three, always, because I am."
Amanda previously revealed that the tragedy left her feeling like a "game show contestant".
She said on her Heart Breakfast show: "We lost our baby Theo at 28 weeks, and they very sensitively moved me into another room so I could deliver him without having to hear the lovely babies screaming on a normal ward.
"Often that's not thought about, it's little things like that. I remember the lady afterwards as well when we went for a chat also said 'I know you're going home empty handed' is what she said to me.
"So I felt like some sort of game show contestant."
