Lauren Silverman recalls pain after finding out she was pregnant with Eric Cowell
Lauren Silverman gave birth to her fiance Simon Cowell's only child, Eric Cowell, in February 2014.
Lauren Silverman said discovering she was pregnant with Simon Cowell's son Eric after their affair with his friend was a painful and life-changing moment.
The 48-year-old socialite battled mixed emotions after finding out she was carrying the 66-year-old music mogul's only child, which was revealed in July 2013 while she was still married to 49-year-old real estate entrepreneur Andrew Silverman.
Appearing on the latest episode of the Happy Mum podcast, host Giovanna Fletcher, 41, asked Lauren: "So what was it like finding out you were pregnant with Eric?"
She replied: "There are so many emotions that went with that because it was like the end of my marriage.
"It was one of the hardest times of my life, and it was just the way that people would look at me. I was on the cover of every magazine and there were news stories about it because... Simon being Simon... and it was just awful."
Getting honest with herself made Lauren - who goes by Lauren Cowell - help her to process the conflicting emotions.
She said: "That was really the pivotal moment for me when I stopped drinking that I was able to really look within and say, 'OK, this is how I feel, and it's OK to feel whatever those things are and with that comes a real sense of freedom and independence.'
"I can't explain it, it's like having a breakthrough, a fog lifted, and that was such a huge moment for me."
Simon was "so emotional" when he learnt Lauren was pregnant with Eric, who was born in February 2014, and is now 12.
And she warned Simon that his life would change forever.
She said: "I just remember thinking in that moment just, 'God, your life is about to change, and you have no idea what's about to happen to you.'
"There's no way he could have known because he was somebody who basically had everything under control, and he had his ways about him, and I think becoming a father completely changed his life."
Lauren had been married to Simon's pal, Andrew, for 10 years when they got together.
In July 2013, Andrew - who has a 20-year-old son named Adam with Lauren - filed for divorce, citing adultery.
In December that year, Simon admitted he "let down" his friend by having an affair with Lauren.
The TV judge told the Daily Mail weekend magazine: "I let down a friend and I feel bad about that, but the good thing it is that I'm having a baby and I never thought I would.
"And it totally changed everything. It was like coming out of a fog; that's the only way I can describe it. I thought, 'Stop feeling sorry for yourself, you've got nothing to feel bad about.'
"It just makes you feel like you've got a responsibility. I definitely feel better. I thought I was going to freak out, but I didn't. It was only the circumstances that were problematic."
Andrew - who, a year after the divorce, described the affair to the New York Observer as "a fascinating experience, unexpected and shocking" - got engaged to Samantha Zimmerman in 2015.
Lauren and Simon, meanwhile, became a couple, and they got engaged in December 2021.
