Billie Lourd feels late mom Carrie Fisher's 'presence' as she marks 7th anniversary of her death
Billie Lourd has opened up about the various stages of grief she has felt since losing her mom seven years ago.
Billie Lourd felt her late mom Carrie Fisher's "presence" on the seventh anniversary of her passing.
The 'Star Wars' legend died after suffering a cardiac arrest aged 60 on December 27, 2016, and Billie, 31, suffered a double loss as her grandmother Debbie Reynolds passed away the following day aged 84.
Billie has battled with immense grief ever since but this year she also felt "grateful" as the losses taught her to appreciate every second.
She began an emotional tribute on Instagram: "It has been 7 years since my mom died (but who's counting?? Me I guess?).
"Every anniversary brings a different iteration of my grief. Some infuse me with rage, some make me cry all day long, some make me feel dissociated and empty, some make me feel nothing, some make me feel guilty for feeling nothing, and some make me feel all of those things all at once."
Billie continued: "This year when I woke up I felt grateful – or griefull if you will. Grief has infused my life with a sense of appreciation I had never had before. It makes me soak up every moment of joy as if it were my last."
She penned: "I laughed at myself then cried more cause I was laughing.
"I felt my mombys presence like the warmth of the sun on your skin on a hot summer day. The kind of warmth where you unknowingly close your eyes and take a slow breath through your nose and grin."
Billie - who has two young children with husband Austen Rydell - feels like her mom is with her "every day" and “infuses" her "joyful moments".
She added: "I miss her every day but the cliche is also true - she is with me every day - she infuses my joyful moments with even more joy. As I tell my son, she lives in the stars - and she damn sure makes my life sparkle. Sending my love to all my griefers out there. And hoping everyone can feel a little sparkle of griefull among all the feelings grief inevitably brings."
